Before we begin, let me tell you where I’m coming from: I love the Two Point series. I got into Two Point Hospital because I liked the idea of Theme Hospital but hated when the game gets shitty. Two Point Hospital is basically Theme Hospital by a lot of the same developers, but without passing the shit threshold. Since then, I’ve eagerly awaited each entry.

So, maybe it’s no surprise that I love Two Point Museum. Don’t get me wrong, it’s totally possible for me to be disappointed by a sequel to something I like – happens all the time – but Two Point Studios has never given me the impression that they might veer off course. As far as I know, Sega has never uttered the phrase, “But what if it was a Two Point live service game.” Indeed, Two Point Museum is more Two Point. Just with museum.

MORE MUSEUM, LESS INTEGRITY

I say that as though every Two Point game is the same, and really, they share formulaic elements, but each drops a different toad into the management stew. They’re all linked together by the fact that they each take place in the fictional Two Point County, they have similar toolsets, and they’re filled with hapless puppet people who value profit over dignity. The chirpy soundtracks are all very reminiscent, and you’re kept constant company by the “Tannoy Voice” over the loudspeaker. There’s never any mistaking that you’re playing a Two Point game, which works in terms of consistency. It’s always reminded me of the glory days of Maxis’ Sim series.

Two Point Museum is the first game in the series that feels more like a “Tycoon” game of old. Both Two Point Hospital and Two Point Campus are largely focused on flow. People go through a process; curing an illness in Hospital and going through university in Campus. Both have you trying to make the process more effective (and expensive) so that your customers come out the other side improved but with lighter pockets. Museum is more about providing the most effective product to drain the pockets of the customers swirling about your hallways.

It’s interesting! The gameplay loop involves building your museum and hiring staff, sending your staff out to acquire new exhibits, then monetizing those exhibits as effectively as possible so you can improve your museum and fund more expeditions. Expeditions just have you send out the prerequisite staff into the world and wait until they return or hit a problem that you need to resolve. You never really run out of things to do around the museum, so the hands-off approach works to keep the flow going.

ARTIFACTS ARE JUST EVERGREEN CONTENT

You have full control over your museum’s layout. While previous Two Point games had you construct interiors out of rooms of specified functions, your exhibition floors are more freeform. There are still the classic enclosed rooms when it comes to bathrooms, gift shops, cafeterias, and various staff-only spots, but the bulk of your buildings will be an empty canvas for you to arrange the crap you find out in the world.

Each exhibit has ratings for “buzz” and knowledge. Buzz can be increased by decorating the surrounding area and getting higher-quality versions of the item by grinding the same sites. Knowledge is gained by analyzing the exhibits, which is kind of dumb. Analysis requires you to destroy the artifact, which nets you a single point. While most exhibits have a maximum of three knowledge ranks, that means you need to complete the same expedition repeatedly in order to find duplicates to analyze. While this sometimes naturally happens as you seek the best quality version of an exhibit, it can be a grind. If there’s one place Two Point Museum gets really bogged down it’s with analysis. There isn’t only one place, though.

However, the framework is pretty great in the way that you never run out of things to do. Between managing staff, tweaking the placement of exhibits, expanding to create new exhibition areas, keeping guests happen, balancing the budget, and improving the quality of your exhibits, there’s always something to do.

MORE PROFIT FROM DEATH

There’s also crime, as thieves and vandals arrive to complicate things. You can hire more security staff and set up camera networks, but really, I never had much of a problem with thieves. Maybe I’m just really good at security, or maybe crime is just a simple problem on purpose so that you’re not constantly frustrated by the constant loss of meticulously placed historical furniture. Admittedly, that would kind of suck.

There are also frozen things, such as bees and cavemen. If the ice melts, the contents run amok. Allegedly. I never had it happen because keeping them cool is easy peasy. I’ve had botany exhibits die from underwatering, but never thawed frozen things, so I guess I wish there was a bit more opportunity for failure. Or, alternatively, I wish I was worse at management games. You heard me.

One thing that I did have happen frequently enough is staff going MIA. Circling back to expeditions, before you set out, you’re given a list of possible events that could happen on the journey, and the trick to a good journey is eliminating all the worst stuff by applying items, setting staff with specific skills, and so on. Some possible events will just eat your staff, which is pretty rad. Others will turn them into frog people or make them puke everywhere they walk, which is less rad.

PLUNDER THE WORLD

There are five museums, and Two Point Studios did a great job of giving them lots of variety. If you’re familiar with Two Point Hospital, that game had about a jillion hospital locations, and a lot of them were mostly interchangeable. In Museum, they have pretty colourful hooks. You’ll be helping clean up an environment, trying to activate an alien artifact by travelling through space, or catching and imprisoning ghosts. Significantly creative twists.

More importantly, rather than being allowed to sit in a particular location and work your way up to a full three stars before ditching it and moving on, you can only make so much progress in one spot before you have to jump to other museums to earn more collective stars. Not only does this give you the ability to swap whenever things start feeling stale, you’re also able to spend more time getting absorbed in the smaller details of your museums. The new format really helps enable more creativity.

On the other hand, you’re not just trying to meet profit goals. In order to get stars at each Museum, you need to complete objectives. It’s the other place where things can get gummed up, since, while some just require you to get enough exhibits, others take more time, like having to wait for marketing campaigns to complete.

It can be especially slow if you’re struggling to turn a profit. The economics can be a bit tricky as you balance staff salaries against the ever-changing amount of donations you bring in. There are plenty of ways to get out of the red, such as loans and sponsorship deals, but expeditions are expensive, and I’ve found myself in situations where profits come in at a trickle. I always found ways back into the green, and I like a bit of challenge, but staring at the same list of objectives can get pretty exhausting. It’s a fine line that Two Point Museum sometimes dances on. Only occasionally.

BE CAREFUL, YOU MIGHT LEARN SOMETHING

One weird issue I had was the pace at which staff level up. Simply, I never had a staff member get to the point where all their perks are unlocked (level 20). In fact, I think the highest I ever got to is level 14, and on that occasion, I had earned all the stars on that location. It wasn’t a huge issue, but it says something when even my most used staff members didn’t cap out throughout the entire course of a location.

None of the things I complained about are huge issues, though. They’re more borderline problems. Annoyances, maybe. On the whole, I love Two Point Museum.

Truly, it’s mostly for the reason I love any of the Two Point games: the personality. The series’ humour is well-honed, depicting a mundane world of profits over all else. There are so many individual animations throughout the game that it’s borderline excessive. The denizens of Two Point County don’t know how to keep their hands to themselves, so they’ll run their fingers over even the most dangerous gewgaws in entertaining ways. There’s clearly a lot of love that was put into them, especially since you’ll probably be viewing the game from a zoomed-out perspective for the most part and might not even see half of them.

DON’T COME BACK WITHOUT SOMETHING OLD

If that personality is diminished in one spot, it’s with the radio DJs who do their routine between songs. The central ones: Ricky Hawthorn, Harrison Wolff, and Sir Nigel Bickelworth are all back, along with a new one, Haley Von Brau (I think that’s how it’s spelt). All of them voiced by the same guy (well, except Haley). However, there don’t seem to be as many skits, and they don’t hit the same.

Now, listen, Two Point Hospital apparently had a crazy amount of audio. Something like three hours of just the DJs, advertisements and Tannoy voice. I’d believe the Tannoy voice is still as vocal as she always was, but the DJs seem to have lost steam. They’re randomly presented, so maybe I’m just hearing repetition through bad luck of the draw, but there are also skits from previous games presented as “best of” segments. I don’t know, this is a small thing that I bring up only because I’m a fan.

Speaking of petty complaints, why are there no arcade cabinets to place around the museum? Hospital and Campus had OutRun and Crazy Taxi 3: High Roller, respectively, but Museum has none. Disappointed.

Anyway, with that all aside, Two Point Museum is another great showing for the series. I’m undecided on which of the games I like best, but I’m equally undecided on which I like least. They each bring their own twist while offering the same vibrancy. Two Point Museum is, perhaps, the most interesting economically while also doling out a unique progression. It might be the best one for newcomers. There’s more freedom and room for tinkering, as well as more room for expressing yourself through customization. It’s worth more than two points. It’s worth eight. Though, it would be a lot more satisfying if it was actually a 2 outta 10.

8/10

This review was conducted using a digital Steam version of the game. A key was provided by the publisher’s PR.