Let The Old Star Fox Lie

Has it really been ten years? A whole decade since the last Star Fox game was inflicted upon the masses. I’ve seen people on social media actually celebrating the 10th anniversary of that game. Something about Fox being in The Super Mario Galaxy Movie reignited something in me. A desire to write about video games. Specifically about the Star Fox franchise. I suppose it’s time I address this old wound.

For the five of you that recognize me, you may remember that I wrote a retrospective of both Star Fox Zero and Star Fox Guard back in 2018. I tore them a new one and mourned what I saw at the time as the death of the franchise. Now Fox is in a Hollywood movie and there have been rumors that a new Star Fox game is on the horizon. One with a greater emphasis on the narrative with funnier dialogue, according to the VGC Podcast. Or maybe that was bait to root out some leakers? Whatever the case, Star Fox returned to the public consciousness in a notable way, at least momentarily. So I suppose now’s as good of a time to address these new developments while they’re still somewhat relevant.

YOU’RE A STAR, FOX

Let’s get to the movie first. I did end up seeing it around the time it came out for sheer curiosity. I didn’t hear great things about the first Mario movie, and I wasn’t terribly interested in the second one. My expectations for a Hollywood-backed, Minions Studio-produced Mario movie was somewhere around the Mariana’s Trench. But I went in with an open mind and I have to admit…

It was mid.

It’s not How to Train Your Dragon, but it’s no Shark Tale either. It was average. Something that I would probably be into if I was a child. Of course, child me also unironically enjoyed things like Butt-Ugly Martians and eating dry dog food, so what does he know? I at least enjoyed the Fox scenes. His personality was okay. At least he actually has a personality now. And he does a pilot real good. So yeah, I don’t hate it. I would not be opposed to a potential Star Fox movie, provided that someone other than Illumination does it.

NEVER GIVE UP! TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS!

Now let’s talk about that game rumor. From what I saw, it dropped almost immediately after the movie announcement, so it’s already pretty sus. But even if Nintendo was actually making a Star Fox game again, I honestly don’t think I want that. I just don’t trust Nintendo to handle the franchise. This isn’t just because I’m still bitter about Star Fox Zero, although that is certainly part of it. I will never not be bitter about the game that killed one of my favorite franchises, but that series had already been a sine wave of quality trending downward after 64.

Star Fox Adventures started development as a completely different game before Miyamoto suggested that they put Fox McCloud in there. Maybe the original Dinosaur Planet would have been better, but what we got was something that doesn’t measure up to The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. It’s certainly no Beyond Good and Evil. Star Fox Assault was much better, but it suffered from a short campaign and some truly awful on-foot sections. I admit I may be a bit biased about the game since the multiplayer has a jetpack mode in it. And I do love me some jetpacks.

While I enjoyed Star Fox Command for it’s more tactical elements, large roster of playable characters with their own ships, branching storyline and online multiplayer, it’s not something I will ever recommend. The controls were terrible, the only actual on-rails sections were the repetitive Stop The Missile sections, and some of those endings were not great, including the default ending. I haven’t played Star Fox 64 3D, but what I saw was basically Star Fox 64 again with slightly better graphics, so I didn’t feel I missed much. And without wishing to repeat myself, Star Fox Zero and Star Fox Guard are the concepts of good games bogged down by some of the most bone-headed decisions I’ve ever seen.

PLAY BACK, BUT I WON’T REPLAY THE SCHEME

This leads me to my second criticism of the series. Nearly half of the entire franchise is the same fucking game. Star Fox on the SNES. Star Fox 64. Star Fox 64 3D. Star Fox Zero. It’s all the same game remade or rebooted for new consoles. I know people give Nintendo games shit for basically being the same game over and over, but at least with most of their franchises, there’s always some new gameplay gimmick or setting, or at least some new characters. Even Pokemon has some new characters to make merch out of. But in this case, it really is the same game over and over.

“Umm actually, Star Wolf didn’t show up until Star Fox 64, which re-used content from the then-canceled Star Fox 2. And Star Fox Zero has new gameplay ideas.” Thank you once again, Mr. Pedant, for completely missing my point. Having nearly half of your entire series be rehashes of the exact same game makes it feel like the series is unable to move on from its peak. And on the occasions when it does try something new, more often than not it fails to stick the landing.

THE FAN FAVORITE

Finally, I wanted to touch upon a concern a friend of mine raised to me regarding the state of the franchise. See, within furry circles there is a not insignificant amount of people who see Fox as a gay icon and have him shipped with other male characters like Falco or Wolf, completely ignoring everything from Star Fox Adventures through Star Fox Command. And there’s a very real concern that if Nintendo revives the franchise, then it stops feeling like our thing and becomes Nintendo’s thing again, which could lead to a larger crackdown on fan content. Setting aside the fact there’s an equally large fan base for Krystal and the wealth of other Nintendo fan content out there, there’s something I think everyone should keep in mind. It’s something that’s been said before by other people, but it bears repeating.

Intellectual property is not real.

Obviously, nobody can steal your own creative ideas that are in your head right now. But aside from that, all IP dictates is which fan projects get to make money. I give Illumination shit for being a bunch of hacks, but I’m not going to hate them when they inevitably shit out a low effort Star Fox movie and completely mis-characterize the entire cast. The old Star Fox games I love are still there. At the end of the day, there’s not really a huge difference between a Hollywood studio making what amounts to a Star Fox fan flim and me wearing my Fox McCloud fursuit to put shitposts on the internet. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t call shit for what it is. I’m just saying that those are the stakes.

DEATH OF THE AUTHOR

As for the games, I honestly think that Nintendo should just let the series lie. They really painted themselves into a corner with Star Fox Zero. What’re they gonna do this time? Do another Star Fox 64 remake? Tried that. Didn’t work. Do they try going in a new direction? Tried that. Didn’t work. The best we can hope for is Star Fox 99 or something. A shallow game that wears the skin of Star Fox.

Or maybe they’ll farm out the IP to a third party like they’ve done with Metroid. It wouldn’t be the worst idea. There aren’t really a ton of post-Nintendo games imitating Star Fox right now, so there’s not as much of a chance that whatever hypothetical new game comes out will be outclassed by indies like Metroid has consistently been. But that would require Nintendo to actually care about the franchise beyond simple nostalgia cash grabs. And I just don’t see that.

Either way, it’s not like any of this is will stop fan creations. There will always be things like A Fox in Space, Date with Falco, Star Fox: Event Horizon, and many others made by people who love Star Fox. Just look at Project M. The Super Smash Bros. Brawl mod got shut down in the mid 2010s after the devs finally got a C&D from Nintendo. Did that halt all development of the mod? Nope. A bunch of fan modders forked it and created Project+ years later. A project that’s still going to this day. Not to mention all of the ROMhacks and other fan projects that popped up long after Pokemon Uranium got shut down.

But who knows? Maybe that new Star Fox game is real, and it’ll make this entire article look pointless. Won’t I look the fool? Well, more so than usual anyway. As for me, I think I’ll finally give Ex-Zodiac a try. I don’t normally play titles still in Early Access, but it looks really good. And I could use something to fill the Star Fox-shaped void in my life.