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Review – Pu-Li-Ru-La
The beat-'em-up series is a varied as you can get when it comes to putting fists into faces and faces into concrete, but Pu-Li-Ru-La stands apart in its cartoon art-style. It's just too bad that it can't live up to the intense, wall-to-wall weirdness of its third stage.
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Review – Slime Rancher
Slime Rancher is among the most successful cozy games in the niche, and for the most part, I love it. However, it's like a glass of milk; it's very enjoyable at first, but if you sit with it too long, it starts to smell and you don't want to drink it.
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Review – Alien vs. Predator (Arcade)
If you were tickling me mercilessly and would only stop if I named what developer made the best beat-’em-ups, I’d say Capcom. Without coercion and with some time to think about it, I might come up with a more interesting answer, but it’s more likely that I’d still just say Capcom. I grew up in rural Ontario, which is a…
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Review – Slayers X: Terminal Aftermath: Vengance of the Slayer
I was a teenager once (surprising, I know), so I know what it was like to be awkward, terrible, and still think of yourself as the center of the universe. I never thought a game could possibly capture that period in our lives, but Slayers X: Terminal Aftermath: Vengance of the Slayer [sic] does just that.
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Review – Elevator Action Returns
How is Elevator Action Returns not talked about more? Don’t get me wrong, it’s not the absolute most obscure arcade game that I’ve covered. It even recently got an enhanced port (of the Sega Saturn version) called Elevator Action Returns S-Tribute, but it’s so much better than its niche suggests. I already love Elevator Action, the 1983 game that is…
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Review – Zunzunkyou no Yabou
When it comes to arcade games, actually being enjoyable to play isn’t always the most important aspect. To succeed in the arcade – and really, this is still true in what passes for an arcade these days – you needed to be attention-grabbing. Look at the original Mortal Kombat, for instance. It was absolutely shit to play, but the mix…
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Review – Hoshi wo Miru Hito
I’ve spent quite some time mired in the sticky pits of kusoge. Crap games are becoming an area of expertise for me. That’s not simply to say that I know of a lot of bad games, but rather that I know how to appreciate them. That’s right. Did you know you can enjoy bad games? Not just in an ironic…
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Review – Final Fight
I tend to paradoxically refer to my memory as both a steel trap and completely unreliable. I actually have no idea how my recollection compares to other people; how can anyone? However, let me give you an example of the former claim. Somewhere in the foggy depths of my youth, I remember the first time I played Final Fight. It…
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Review – Army Men: Air Combat: The Elite Missions
One of my most significant memories of Army Men: Air Combat: The Elite Missions for Gamecube was a review by Cory D. Lewis, writing for IGN. In their review, they kept on comparing (oh no, how many times am I going to write this?) Army Men: Air Combat: The Elite Missions to an N64 game. This is both in the…
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Review – Ben Bero Beh
I have a confession to make: I’m attracted to weird Japanese arcade games. There’s a word for it: Bakage (Ba-kah-gey, not ba-cage). It means stupid game. It’s not to be mistaken for kusoge (koo-so-gey) which means crappy game. I have made the mistake before, but merely because I didn’t know there was a name for bizarre games. 1984’s Ben Bero…
