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Review – Army Men: Air Combat (GBC)
A lot of the time, when an Army Men title got ported to another platform, it would be remade from the ground up and become a distinct game. However, for some reason, most of the games that landed on Game Boy Color were recognizable ports, including Army Men: Air Combat.
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Review – The Sims Bustin’ Out (Console)
The console port of the original The Sims was okay. It did what it had to do, which was translate the game to console, while also adding on some extra features, like a light story mode and multiplayer. It wasn’t bad, honestly, but it did leave some room to grow. So much room, in fact, that less than a year…
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Review – The Sims (Console)
When The Sims launched on PC in 2000, it quickly established itself as a landmark title. It was the first major success for Maxis since SimCity 2000’s 1993 release, selling somewhere in the neighbourhood of 14 million copies and establishing itself as one of the best selling PC games of all time. Having said that, it has aged horrifically, having…
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Review – Dead or Alive: Xtreme 2
Lisa had been our partner in volleyball for the entire two week vacation, and in that time, she had never removed her thong bikini. We doubted that she, and indeed, any of the girls, had packed anything aside from bathing suits for the trip. We discussed the state of that apparel, nestled firmly between her two buttcheeks. She had been…
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Review – Coffee Crisis
The beat-’em-up genre is one of the simplest formulas in gaming. During the early 90’s, following the release of Final Fight in the arcades, the genre exploded and found itself host to all manner of licensed tie ins. If you had a super-hero, action movie, or mascot that you needed to cram into an interactive format, the conveyor-belt beat-’em-up was…
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Review – Never Stop Sneakin’
I have a pretty severe distaste for Metal Gear Solid, but I will readily admit that it is stylish, which is probably a big factor in its lasting popularity. It copied its MSX predecessors’ palette of cool blues and greys, giving it a cold and sterile appearance, then bloated it out into full 3D. It really owned its blocky, pixelated…
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Review – Army Men: World War: Land Sea Air
Years after writing this review, I had convinced myself that I accidentally played Land Sea Air on hard mode and wasn't able to change it back. So, I tried it again, making sure it was on Medium. Nope, this game really is so unfair that it's painful to play.
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Review – Ghostbusters (NES)
Out of the small handful of non-gaming franchises that I can claim to be a fan of, Ghostbusters is easily the one that I’m most enamored with. I built my own replica proton pack in high school, I’ve donned a flightsuit for many Hallowe’en nights, and my apartment is littered with related merch. I’ve read the comics, watched the cartoons,…
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Review – Zak McKracken and the Alien Mindbenders
One of the first genre journeys I recall embarking on as a retro gaming hobbyist was an exploration of the LucasArts adventure catalogue. During that time, I dug through a scattered assortment of titles, but burned out earlier than I would have liked. I found new favourites in games like The Secret of Monkey Island, but have still yet to…
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Review – Outrun 2019
It’s the unimaginably distant future. The year: 2019. The streets have been overrun by insufferable people who adhere to the speed limit. The death of recreational driving has pushed the Ferrari to the brink of extinction. It’s up to you to bring speed back to the people and remind them of the joy that reckless driving can bring. It’s up…
