Book Cudgel – Worlds of Power: Mega Man 2

The Worlds of Power novels are a series that ran from 1990-’91 by Scholastic. If you’re not familiar, Scholastic is a book publisher that tends to focus on youth novels and educational books. They’re where Goosebumps got published.

Most school children in North America know them for their book fairs. These were exciting times when I was a kid; the school library would clear room for these shelves of glossy books to get set up, and the children would be herded down there to buy them. I will say, it smacks of consumerist marketing and is mostly just to heighten the profile of the publisher, but there’s a positive benefit to it: it encourages reading. And it’s effective, turning buying books into an almost social event.

Anyway, I would have just been going into Kindergarten when the Worlds of Power books came out, so I never had them growing up. I think I maybe knew of their existence, but the only video game novelizations I remember seeing as a kid were the Doom series.

So, I’m going to double back and do something my younger self would appreciate: I’m going to read these books. I’ve found most of them, but I’m going to start with Mega Man 2 by Ellen Miles (under the series’ pen name of F.X. Nine) who also wrote The Puppy Place series and the Kitty Corner series. This may surprise you, but I never read those, either, so let’s move on.

HIGH SCHOOL FANFICTION

This book is fucking awful. It makes me feel better about the fanfiction I wrote in high school. I don’t have that fanfiction anymore, but I have some of my high school writing. Let’s take a look…

We were originally just going to sit around and play video games, but then Mack burst into flames and took the couch with him. So without a comfortable place to sit, we were forced to brave the outdoors.

Zoey, Age 16-ish

I’ve read worse. That sounds like something I’d write nowadays, honestly. I’ve substantially improved since then (I hope), but you can still see my logical flow. What were we talking about?

Right, this is horrible. I know that the Worlds of Power novels were written for children, but, uh, did I really read stuff like this back then? It’s been a while since I’ve picked up Goosebumps. I think I have trouble understanding that a youth book could be so insubstantial and poorly written because I don’t think I could write for children. It’s not just because I have the vocabulary of a trucker with a thesaurus, but I like to stretch my use of the language, and I think that would be lost on kids. Maybe. We’ll see.

“BASED” ON

So, Mega Man 2 is based on the game Mega Man 2, and in case you’re wondering, there was no novelization of the first Mega Man, though the book acts as though there was. That must have been pretty confusing for kids. However, there isn’t much you need to know. Mega Man beat Dr. Wily once before. They thought he was defeated, but he came back. Not exactly A Game of Thrones here.

It gets some things right from the game, like how Mega Man was a “tool-using robot” that got converted to combat. Not only a “tool-using robot” but the best “tool-using robot.” It also gets right that Dr. Wily has occasionally been mistranslated “Dr. Wiley.” It references this by using both spellings on the same page, but it might not be intentional. It doesn’t mention that Wily and Light have worked together.

‘I know, I know,’ said Mega Man. ‘I saw it on the news-beam. Doctor Wily is back. I thought we had destroyed him, but I guess he’s even stronger than we had imagined.’

Dr. Light nodded. ‘And this time he’s created eight of the most terrible robots ever built. Anyone who wants to capture Doctor Wiley has to get past each of those robots first.’ He looked at Mega Man. ‘You have fought many battles, Mega Man, and you have won them all. You may be invincible. You are the finest superrobot I have ever built’

Worlds of Power: Mega Man 2

Those are two consecutive paragraphs, by the way. I didn’t edit them at all. Clearly, nobody did. And that’s not throwing shade at Ellen Miles. Nobody writes flawlessly. Even the most accomplished writers need someone to look over their work. Except me, I don’t have an editor here at Maximum Utmost, don’t know if you can tell. So where was Miles’ editor here? On vacation?

But, like, the opening makes a point to say Mega Man is a robot and, as such, has to follow orders from Light, but, for some reason, they live apart. I have no idea what the point was of having Mega Man be a homeowner.

THE CURSE OF MORTALITY

The first chapter talks about how fucking awesome Mega Man is, but then Dr. Light is, like, “I have to clone you because this mission is too dangerous for just one invincible superrobot.” This is perhaps the prelude to Dr. Light building an army of invincible tool-using battle robots, but thankfully, the copy+paste doesn’t work. Instead, the cloning machine turns Mega Man into a human. I’m not sure how the theories of machine duplication relate to… Uh… personification. I mean, it’s soft science in a children’s book, so whatever, but it’s just such a weird thing to do.

‘B… but… ‘ Mega Man stumbled over the words. ‘Am I still invincible?’

Dr. Light paused. His smile faded. ‘I don’t know. I certainly hope so, but there’s no way to be sure.’ He put his hand on Mega Man’s shoulder. ‘You’ll just have to be extra careful.’

Mega Man felt something he’d never felt before. It was a strange feeling and it mane him jumpy. The feeling was fear. It was a feeling he’d have to put behind him if he hoped to destroy Dr Wily.

Worlds of Power: Mega Man 2

“We have no way of knowing if you’ll die,” said Dr. Light with a strange glint in his eye. “Go test that out for me.”

Again, I have no clue why this had to be added. I can not understand the sense of this creative liberty. It creates so many questions that I don’t think Miles even knew what to do with it. It’s just like, suddenly, Mega Man can experience concussions. But they’re not sure if Mega Man is still invincible, but he can still use power pellets to heal himself. Like, there’s no balance here. He has a heart now and can feel the curse of self-awareness, but also he still has all the abilities he had before.

It just raises so many questions. At least varying depictions of him have shown that his blue outfit with the external undies are just clothing (or armor, maybe), so we don’t have to ask if he now has blue skin, but what stage of development is he in? Is he going to have to go through the horrors of puberty, because that’s a lot for anyone to go through, let alone a robot that suddenly grew a gender. But, mercifully, the book doesn’t dwell on long because Dr. Light has no moral issues with sending a human into combat instead of a tool-using robot.

WALKTHROUGH

I’m pretty convinced that, weird plot additions aside, Ellen Miles was familiar with Mega Man 2 when they wrote this. The novel just follows Mega Man going through condensed descriptions of the levels, but the basics of their mechanics are there. I’m not saying they played the game themselves, but they at least read the manual or a walkthrough in Nintendo Power. 

It might be the latter, because the story, appropriately, starts on Metal Man’s stage. Considering the fact that these games contained just the absolute worst hints for the game, it might be written specifically to demonstrate the optimal path through the game to children. The order in the book goes Metal Man>Flash Man>Bubble Man>Air Man>Crash Man>Heat Man>Wood Man>Quick Man. Not really the route I would have taken myself, but since three of the robot masters in Mega Man 2 are weak against the Metal Blade, it’s valid.

But Mega Man activated the autofire mechanism in the Metal Blade to fire again and again at his enemy.

And then it was over. Flash Man was destroyed. ‘You’ve got to be more than just a flash in the pan to beat me!’ said Mega Man, smiling.

Worlds of Power: Mega Man 2

Anyway, that’s literally most of the book. You get a brief description of Mega Man traversing the levels. Sometimes, the author literally includes the two-door-hallway sequence before bosses. There’s a fight that is rarely more than a couple paragraphs. Mega Man says a god-awful pun. Then it moves on.

THE LANGUAGE

And, to be honest, I don’t have much issue with that. I think the writing itself – the language and composition – are what bothers me the most. Like, if you handed me Mega Man 2 and asked me to write a book about it, I’d probably do something really strange with it. I’d maybe give all the robot masters (superobots in the book) personalities and history, goals and fears, and then make it really depressing when Mega Man has to destroy them. And then, when it comes time to take down Wily, Mega Man is extremely depressed, so Dr. Light has to adjust his programming to allow more moral leeway, but that doesn’t quite work, so the only other option is to wipe his memory, but Mega Man doesn’t want that, so Dr. Light is, like, “Well, you either suck it up or we’re factory resetting you,” so Mega Man has to reluctantly accept violence.

But that might be a bit too much for kids, so just half-describing the stages and ending a chapter in a fight is probably better for the subject matter. It’s boring! But I’m sure children with functioning imaginations would dig it.

It’s really the descriptions that bother me. Look at this:

Then he noticed Air Man’s Jet-Ski — sort of a snowmobile that floated on a cushion of air — he took that, too.

Worlds of Power: Mega Man 2

The point of reference used for a flying board is a snowmobile that floats on a cushion of air. There is already something called a Jet-Ski, and it’s like a snowmobile that floats on water. I guess maybe “A Jet-Ski is like a Jet-Ski” might be a bit awkward, but it’s not much like a snowmobile, either. Maybe, like, as surf board that flies.

It’s later written that:

Robots aren’t bothered by extremes of heat and cold — their circuits adjust to any temperature they face.

Worlds of Power: Mega Man 2

But later, we’re told:

Heat Man called. Heat Man looked like an ordinary robot, but his steel body was so hot that it glowed. The air around him sizzled. But he never felt the heat, since his protective armor kept him cool.

Worlds of Power: Mega Man 2

It was already explained why robots don’t feel heat, but it seems like the author forgot on the next page and thought it would be cool if Heat Man could withstand heat. You know, unlike other robots that are more susceptible to heat.

HEADLESS CHICKENS

So much in the book is more than “Mega Man had ever seen.” Every fight is a couple exchanges before Mega Man throws a few onamatopea’s out, and then it’s over. Then you get descriptions like:

The Atomic Chickens ran around like real chickens (with their heads cut off).

Worlds of Power: Mega Man 2

I’m sorry, now children are being given decapitated chickens as a reference to how robotic chickens move? I guess you might be able to imagine the chaos of that without understanding that it’s the final twitching death throes of the bird. You know, as long as your brain is still full of whimsy and you don’t have an understanding of the world.

Eventually, all the robot mas… “superrobots” are dead, and it’s on to Dr. Wily’s castle or “Castle of Evil.” It’s here that I thought things might get a little more interesting again, but it’s once again an almost literal condensed version of the game. Nothing of interest happens. He encounters Guts-Dozer, but I’m guessing Miles never played the first game or read its instruction manual since Mega Man doesn’t remark that it looks like a giant Guts Man.

Bizarrely, the boss rematch teleporters are still in there. It probably would have been a good time to add some tension by maybe, say, having all the boss clones take on Mega Man at once, but instead, it’s such a conveyor belt of destruction. Miles does get a bit creative here with alliteration.

He canceled Crash Man.

He blew up Bubble Man. He mowed down Metal Man. He flattened Flash Man.

He wiped out Wood Man. He made Quick Man quit.

And finally, he harpooned Heat Man.

All the superrobots were history.

Worlds of Power: Mega Man 2

I’m not sure why the formatting is weird, but he canceled Crash Man? The use of the term as we know it wasn’t common parlance in 1990, but now I’m just thinking that Mega Man discovered Crash Man’s flash drive full of illicit pornography and got his TV contract ripped up. Why not “He crushed Crash Man?” Then, you get an even more effective alliteration.

The fight with Dr. Wily is worse than most of his fights with the superrobots. Wily appears, and he’s defeated in the very next paragraph. Thank goodness, I was afraid there might be some actual tension. But then, just like in the game, he runs off. Mega Man pursues, and, you guessed it (if you remember the game), he fights an alien hologram. Then Wily is just begging at his feet. There is no exchange between Wily and Mega Man, but I guess when both your master plans are defeated in a paragraph each, there is nothing left to be said.

CANCEL CULTURE

Then there’s a chapter to wrap everything up, and it’s hilarious. Just look at this:

Mega Man had turned Dr. Wily over to Dr. Light for justice. The evil genius was still begging for mercy, but Mega Man knew that Dr. Light was planning to put him into prison for the next billion years.

Worlds of Power: Mega Man 2

I thought I was joking when I said that he was going to make an army of invincible tool-using robots, but it sounds like he’s already wielding some real authoritarian power here. He can just prosecute and imprison Dr. Wily for eternity. Guy’s already judge, jury, and executioner. Are we sure Dr. Wily is the bad guy here? Maybe he’s just a dick.

And then the novel closes in the most appropriate way I can think of. Miles describes the end credits of the game. You know how Mega Man walks home through the field, and all the seasons change around him? Yeah, according to the book, that’s him reflecting on how nice the area looks at all times of the year. I mean, okay, I didn’t think that he was walking so slowly that it took him an entire year to get home, but I also wouldn’t have interpreted it as him daydreaming after a robot murder spree.

Children were thankfully spared a Mega Man 3 novelization, but I have to admit, I am very curious how Miles would have interpreted Proto Man since even the manual doesn’t even mention him, and the game doesn’t really give you a good idea of who he is. I can only imagine that the explanation would be that Dr. Wily brainwashed an orphan to fight against Mega Man.