Zoey Handley
Zoey made up for her mundane childhood by playing video games. Now she won't shut up about them. Her eclectic tastes have worried many. Don't come to close, or she'll shove some weird indie or retro game in your face. It's better to not make eye contact. Cross the street if you see her coming.
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Review – Castlevania X: Rondo of Blood
As a fan of the Castlevania series, it might be surprising that I've only now finally gotten around to beating Rondo of Blood. I had even completed Dracula X years before, so figure that one out. Now that I've finally consummated with it, here's what I think.
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Review – Castlevania
I still remember the day after I first completed Castlevania. I met with my friend and said to him, "Okay, you're really not going to care or even understand what I'm going to tell you, so just pretend to be excited: I beat Castlevania." He was very convincing in his performance.
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Review – Metal Slug
Do you know the Tragically Hip song "Bobcaygeon?" That's actually the next town over from where I grew up. There was a bowling alley there (it burned down), and they had a limited number of arcade machines. For a period, one of these machines was Metal Slug. I've been in love ever since.
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Review – No More Heroes III
Bed of rice, I lay down and then nap it up. That's the good stuff. I think crowbar-induced amnesia is the only way I'd lose my love for the No More Heroes series. I mean, Travis Strikes Back was pretty close. Thankfully, No More Heroes III isn't that. Mostly.
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Review – Resident Evil 7: Biohazard
I stopped following the Resident Evil series after the disappointment that was Resident Evil 5. I didn't stop caring, though, so I was happy to see it return to horror. And Resident Evil 7 is a good time, just, you know, barring a few problems I had with it.
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Review – The Manga Works
I like to consider myself a writer. Sometimes. Not a manga writer, but I craft stories. Not right now, this... this is just conversational writing. But I still stay perched in front of my craft for unhealthy amounts of time each day, just like what is conveyed in The Manga Works.
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Review – Metal Max 2 Reloaded
I am so hot for the Metal Max series. Mmm, that is one enticing progression of games. But, like, none of them have been localized. So, in the face of an unfair, uncaring world, I've had to turn to the depraved world of fan translations for Metal Max 2 Reloaded.
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Review – Wolfenstein: The Old Blood
Nazis are easily some of the most fun-to-kill bad guys in video games. This goes back well before Wolfenstein 3D, but the series has really run with it. Wolfenstein: The Old Blood is a step back from the tech Nazis of The New Order but feels weirdly fresh.
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Review – Cyberpunk 2077
I love cyberpunk, by which I mean the genre, not the game. The game is just all right. I'm not mad about its launch. To be honest, I didn't care. But even with all its performance issues and bugs under control, Cyberpunk 2077 is just another open world game.
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Review – Star Fox
Star Fox and me, we go way back. I played it when I was very young, and I didn't care about the polygonal 3D graphics. At this point, its technologically antiquated, but that doesn't mean there isn't any value in playing it today.
